Shannon
by on December 12, 2020
321 views
Normally my psilocybin trips are filled with enlighten discoveries and overall a better understanding of my own psyche. I can say that most of my psychedelic trips aren't "fun" because of the rollercoaster of emotions I personally go through. A few days ago I had taken 3.5g of some shrooms my friend had grown and harvested by herself. I started off feeling very odd, my chest was heavy and my throat felt itchy and as if I had a huge mass stuck there. Trying to understand where this feeling was coming from I started brainstorming all of the recent events that have impacted me. The one that stood out the most was telling my mother and father that I was raped as a child by a relative. I wasn't able to speak about my rape until recently. Once I concluded my source of sadness it immediately became the gasoline that fueled my anger. I had never felt rage this intense. At this point I had walked all around my room until I ended up in my closet. The closet was pitch dark with no ventilation. My eyes were closed but I could see? See colors and shapes that I can't explain also I felt a strong wind in that closet. Sitting in there filled with rage of my childhood on how some people can be so disgusting to destroy a child's innocence up to how our own U.S government doesn't care for its people, truly its predatory capitalism but yet again amazed with the beautiful understanding with an emotion that isn't accepted and personally was really repressed. It felt amazing to be enraged and being able to cry so hard. Also being able to release such emotions inspired me to paint my peacock.
Anyone experienced an intense emotion that spoke to them and helped them reflect?
Posted in: Psilocybin, Meditation
20 people like this.
AlHuxley
Fucked up things happen to us, and im sorry you had to experience that. But the great thing about entheogens, is they tear down those walls and let us in on the secret that if you dont let it hurt you anymore.....it cant hurt you.... Everyone thinks of psychs as this peaceful drug that will fix you ... View More
Like December 13, 2020 Edited
casual_monk
Have had that same throat sensation. Was told by a medicine guide that it is due to a protective mechanism that I developed as a child (the mechanism was not speaking up about incredibly painful things)which she said was a wise thing to do at the time, but that it doesn’t serve me in adulthood. I st... View More
Like December 13, 2020
Shannon
Thank you guys! Mush love
Like December 24, 2020
Noumena
Thanks for sharing this story!
Like January 8, 2021