Video First DMT trip - Ego death?

Lmao. Please don’t judge. It was so beautiful I can’t not share. There never ended up being any actual pee, etc. I don’t know what the whet sensation down my back was. I got what I was looking for. https://youtu.be/MLh2hAH8Pv8

I am a 39 year old mother and ex-teacher, and I tried DMT on May 24, 2019 at about 5:30 PM. The Spirit Molecule came to my attention while I was researching unconventional treatments for depression and anxiety. I started to crave the joy for life people described having upon returning from DMT trips.  Researching DMT became a new favorite past time. Long story short, I was able to network socially, make new friends, and DMT was gifted into my life.

The Spirit Molecule was in my possession for a week before I could set the stage for launch. On the big day I ate 0.5 grams of mushies at 9:00 AM to relax me and help me have a positive day leading up to my DMT trip. This worked out. My day was amazing with no negative thoughts (not an easy task for me). I set my trip intentions: Peace, Happiness, Meaning. Writing each word on the finger of my left hand in sparkly permanent marker. Cleaning and texting excitedly with a friend helped to pass the time.

When 4:30 arrived my husband and I smoked some Cannabis and got all cheeched out. At about 5:00 PM my long distance guide gave me a pep talk. Checked the dosage (50mg) I had measured out and gave me some final instructions on how to melt the molecule, etc. My husband prepped the room a little to give him better control, and set up the camera (I’m getting crazy chills while writing this… just thinking of it). I decided to wear my noise canceling earphones to decrease exterior noises. On advice, I coated my mouth with liquid breath mint.

My husband started the camera. We told each other we loved the other. I turned the melter on, and melted the DMT crystal by pressing and holding the button for about three seconds, twice. I then held down the button and inhaled slowly until I couldn’t expand my lungs further.

My eyes were open. Before exhaling items/reality began telescoping into contric layers. This startled me, and I exhaled a little before I wanted to. I managed to hold most of it in, but was worrying what I let out would prevent me from breaking through. The last of the first hit left my lungs. The concentric layers the world broke into started to grow in detail. The layers began to move in patterns unique to each layer. Each layer could be zoomed in on like a Mandelbrot and held its own dimensional objects within and more within those. At this point I was in and observing my living room. I remember hearing liquid metallic like clinks and drips. With great effort I lifted the melter to clear the chamber. I can remember my husband taking the melter from me. The concentric layers of reality jumped into hyper speed; becoming faster and more elaborate. I heard an earth shaking sound like a bursting metallic liquid bubble whose pieces became an infinite number of tiny higher pitched bursting metallic liquid bubbles. And then my living room disappeared, and I was slingshotted into the Big Bang.

I was everything and nothing, energy and matter, creation and destruction. Visually the Universe Expanded and collapsed and infinite number of times. It was so intense. I knew everything and understood nothing. I was still me, but in a different state of matter. Compared to all the other sensations what seemed like a tiny voice in the void (my voice) kept reminding me to breath. During these times I had a slight sensation of lungs and breathing. It was also like drowning in a stream on knowledge because you couldn’t understand any of it.

At some point images of life started to flash around me. Babies being born, plants growing, weddings, death, life… beautiful life. Images of things I had experienced and understood. I gained what I believe is a true insight. At some points we are that infinite sense of everything, the birth and death of infinite universes, energy, matter, and so on. So intense.  When in the flesh (or likely any conscious form or entity) we can begin to understand what is known. To experience it like a slow warm comforting bath…. Knowing and understanding.

As I came back to my body I had the overwhelming sensation the Big Bang moment originated in my mouth or head.  My eyes snapped open. It was so beautiful to be back; to have this meat sack holding me in place so I could gain perspective and understand. The visuals at this point were like the pre-blast off variety. Seeing my husband and dogs was amazing. I felt so grateful. Feel free to watch the video for a more details on what happened on the come down. It was certainly a trip.