The Next Phase, Contact?

To boldly go. To discover. I am beside myself with what to do next, except to keep going.

I witnessed my avatar on Saturday, and on Sunday I was so excited about discovering proof beyond doubt that we are more than just this. More than religion. More than our dogmas.

Today it settled in, and I still don't know what to do, so like any obsessed explorer I doubled down and went deeper.

Eyes wide open is my new preference. Why? Because you get to remember everything, and you get to see the truth behind our world. I sit in front of my closet mirror because seeing myself means more to me than an object or nature. (though nature DMT trips are exceptional)

In order to accomplish what I have I must load my PAX with what I estimate to be 1/4 teaspoon, maybe a little more. Then I inhale. I inhale over and over and over. I keep it going for as long as I can and then I inhale more.

There is a threshold where all the pretty colors and moving object stop. The room goes deafening quiet. The light goes ultra bright and then... Click.

The room is no longer your room. Sitting there, in front of you is you. You see you. The real you, which is not you, but it is you. It is not your name. It is not your face (though it looks like you). It is the game. Your avatar.

That was Saturday. The day my mind was blown.

Today I went back, and I came right up to the threshold. I went for the next inhale to push me through and the PAX turned off.  I laughed. That was my fault. Just a single slip of concentration brings you right back to your ass on the carpet. LOL

I reloaded the PAX and went back in.

This time I decided to not cross the threshold and instead witness the environment. I pushed and I pushed through. The PAX felt like it was on fire (a common feeling despite it not being hot) and the smoke was really starting to burn my throat. Then something amazing happened.

I have felt light before. Usually on a shoulder, but this time there were at least three lights. They came through my window, and began to orbit my body. I could feel their warmth. I felt like this was the next step. They orbited my head faster and faster. I could feel energy rising like something was about to happen. I said "I'm ready" and the light began to enter me. The image I have attached hits me as how the light moved, but not of course a ring of lights. More of orbs, one a soft yellow, one magenta, and another green or blue.

Then that was it. I couldn't continue the smoking anymore. I was spent.

I then felt like I was supposed to vomit. I didn't feel like vomiting. I hate vomiting. I didn't argue and I said okay. I went to the bathroom, got on my knees and said "I can't believe I'm doing this" and I retched. Nothing came out but a sound. I said “what is this a ceremonial vomit?” and that was it.

Today I am unsure. What do I do next? I know about the game but I can’t feel it. How quickly I have adapted to the idea that we are more than this. I think it is time fore a vacation.

Anyway, yeah. There it is. I would like to say try it, but it may leave you with more questions than answers.

What were the light orbs? Are they terrestrial or are they from outside the construct? Are they helpful, benign or other? Are they even a conscious thing? Yikes!